Sunday, February 01, 2009
brother

Ahhhh yes, another "B"......This time? The word is "BROTHER". I have one brother, Gordon. Gordon is two years older than me, and was my protector, when we were small children. He would stick up for me and defend me and, well, take care of me with those 'Big People'.....I felt he loved me, unconditionally. I've never asked him why he put himself on the line and at risk to protect me, but I should! Well, maybe before I am finished putting this post together I will ask him, and hopefully, he will be able to remember, and I will have the answer to this from the horses mouth....... Oh, Dear.....This is not a happy little face. In fact, this picture breaks my heart. As a teeny tiny little guy---just born---an infant----the doctors had to stick a needle in his head---(Don't ask). That alone could make a little baby look this unhappy and pained......OY! And here is Gordon, right there in the center of the picture....This was taken in Florida at the "Lear" School, I believe.....He couldn't have been more than five years old here....Maybe less. I see this picture and I can see how much one of his daughters looks like him, or did look like him when she was that age........ This is us----Gordon and me at the camp we went to the summer I had just turned four...And, he was going to turn six in September of that year----So, for a few months we were only one year +, apart...... This is one of my favorite pictures of Gordon and me......Again, we are four and six.....This was taken at a little recital we participated in at the house in Great Neck. All four of us played the piano on that afternoon....Gordon is incredibly musical and can make anything into an instrument, even a cardboard tube....! This is Florida, too.....just the two of us. I think I counted on Gordon being 'there' for me. He was such a sweet boy and very loving and gentle with me. I know we hung out, a lot.....And, by the way, I did ask him tonight when I spoke to him why he had "protected" me the way he did when we were little....His answer was very touching. He said, "Because you were precious". He went on to say that he didn't know that word when he was five and I was three, or when I was five and he was seven....but, he said...."That's what you were from my vantage point now." So I said, what was it that made me precious?

(I realized I had never actually asked him about any of this before)....And he said, "Because you were sweet, and kind, and warm, and caring, and fun and loving....!" And he wanted to take care of me and protect all that was good in me. Well, that brought me to tears. And I was always grateful to him for doing just that. He took great great care of me. He went on to say..."And I realized you were the sanest person in the family!" "Well," I said, "You were certainly wrong about that!" LOL! And we laughed.Add Image In truth, we are all pretty nuts...But then, who isn't? But, we are all nice good people.....A Miracle, in a way..... Another favorite picture of the two of us.....We look so innocent and young, and so adorable..... This is about five years later....I have had 'the terrible illness' and we are in Florida, at The Everglades Cabana Club pool, where we spent seven days a week----swimming and playing and then swimming some more.....That is me in the front----with that little belly...and Gordon next to me....our sister Gene is behind me with her leg in a cast, having broken her foot....I do not remember who that other lady is.....Poor Gene was unable to swim for about seven weeks while that cast was on---it was very very hard on her----cause we were all such little fishies in that water.....We loved that pool. And I think it is why I soooo enjoyed The Ambassador Pool all those years later..... And this picture above was just before 'the fall'....The fall of the household; the fall of the family; the fall of my parents marriage. Gordon had the hardest time in our family dynamic, being the only boy. My father was so conflicted about having another male in the house....Daddy was competitive and jealous and could be treacherously mean and extremely hard on Gordon, and then, he would go completely the other way and shower Gordon with all kinds of gifts---too many, too big, too overblown....How confusing is that? Gordon's love affair with the ocean started very early on....maybe he was seven years old....He always had some kind of a boat....even if it was just a row boat or a dingy.....I have written about Gordon's love of the sea and boats before, right after he bought "Little Boat" about a year and a half ago...."Little Boat" is an eleven footer, which was all he felt he could still maneuver at this stage of his life and with his physical problems.... I encouraged him to buy "Little Boat" because I know how important going out onto the water is to him....it is like plasma for him. It's the one place he feels whole and at peace; the one place where he can go and the water clears his head of everything so that when he comes back to land he has a fresh perspective. Being out on the water in a boat relaxes him and makes him whole in some very fundamental way. And it has always been this way for him....I remember going out on his 'runabout' back in the 1950's, all the time....We would have a great time.....Even when he was being 'Captain Queeg', we had a great time.....Sometimes there were other people on the boat, too...sometimes just Gordon and me. We would go out on Long Island Sound.....(He kept the boat docked at a Marina in Port Washington.....)...and just putter about....We went all around Manhattan Island a few times----that could be very scary when you went around the bottom of the Island going from the East River over to The Hudson.....there were huge boats moving around down there and they would cause these enormous waves in their wake....But it was exciting.....And like Gordon, I truly enjoyed it, too.....Not quite the way he did, but it was a wonderful way to get away from everything, and seeing Manhattan from that 18 foot Runabout was pretty awesome....! Just going almost anywhere in Gordon's boat was really wonderful. Gordon never wanted for female company.....ever! In fact, he was quite the Lothario, so to speak...lol. Women just adore Gordon. He seems to have a kind of European Charm that is just this innate thing that he projects---He loves women! Below, is a picture of Gordon and his wife of 25 years, Helen..... Gordon and Helen have three girls....All adults now, and they have two Grandchildren.....They are no longer married. But, they have remained good friends, which is always a good thing, if one can do it..... And above, Gordon and his wife of almost 20 years, Michelle.....They don't have any children of their own, but Michelle has a grown son from her first marriage.....Gordon and Michelle live in Connecticut and though Michelle doesn't share Gordon's love of boating with the same passion as Gordon, she enjoys it very very much, and in fact, encouraged him to get another slightly bigger boat in these late couple of months. It is a West Wight Potter 19 footer.....It can sleep four and has a little galley---so, Michelle, who is a great great cook, can do some good cookin' on this boat, which she couldn't do on 'Little Boat' and they can actually take some little trips....He has fixed this boat up to accommodate his physical problems and now, he cannot wait for Spring to arrive! I love this picture of dear Gordon......He is standing on the dock near his old boat and it was in better days, physically speaking.....He is a great photographer, too....So, it is pretty typical to see him with a camera around his neck.....!

So, there you have it. My dear 'brother' Gordon will turn 80 years old on September 20th, this year.....I can hardly believe it! Where did all the years go? We have gone through a lot of "living" together....ups and downs and ups again, as well as some more downs....but, we are still here......and Gordon still looks forward...He still "practices"; still sees patients; he is a 'Family Therapist'....And he will travel to Slovenia in March to give a paper....He is still incredibly enthusiastic about life and all the things he is doing and plans to do, in spite of his physical problems....... I still feel Gordon's unconditional love and I still feel that he considers me "precious".....And I feel the same about him. You can't ask for more than that....And whatever problems we might have with each other, always fall away. There has never been a time when I wasn't in touch with him----Sometimes more often than others, but always, there has been this strong connection between us that holds fast, and always will.......



More To Come.......


Note: Today, February 1st is an Anniversary for me. It was 48 years ago today that I left New York and moved to Los Angeles.....Hard to believe it has been that long. It was the BEST thing I ever did because Los Angeles has served me well in my life, in every respect....! And there has never been one moment of regret about the decision to move West I'm happy to say----not one teeny tiny millisecond! Isn't that wonderful?












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40 Comments:
had this to say:

The photo of you and Gordon, that is above the one at the Floria club pool, is really picture-perfect; two beautiful children with beautiful personalities to match!

Glad you maintain such a strong and wonderful relationship with your brother, Naomi.

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 4:57:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

Naomi, I have always wanted an older brother, and now you have made me really sorry that I didn't. I want my own Gordon!!

What a good post. I love the photos, and the one of Gordon on the left you on the right with the hat and bows on your shoulders is just wonderful!

Both his wives are pretty and it is nice that he has remained friends with the first one. With his beard, he reminds me of a friend we have who was a dentist, and who played Tevye in some local theater a few years back.

You are doing such a great job with "B"!!

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 5:09:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

What a lovely peek into your childhood with Gordon! I guess you could well be the family historian with the copious files and photos you keep!

Great post,
Anne

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 5:10:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

48 years! Wow. Happy Anniversary. I love this post about your brother. The picture with his scrunched little face and curls was just precious. And I got what you were saying about going all around the island of Manhatten. One of the most fearful times I've ever had was in a small boat in the midst of big ones and the wakes! I thought we were going to flip, crash and drown. You have to really know what you are doing.

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 6:42:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

What a wonderful to have a brother to love and be loved by so unconditionally.

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 7:31:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

Well that was a Valentine and a half! All from the word Brother. I guess I had radar for this post. It really spoke to me. Siblings, especially those close in age, are such a part of each other, in the same boat so to speak. My father was much harder on my brothers too. And part of my grief when two of them died was remembering that.

It is so life giving to be so cherished as your brother cherished you. Lovely post.

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 9:46:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

there is nothing like the bond between siblings who like one another as friend as well as love one another as brother and sister. I watch my two and wonder if they will carry on in adulthood to support one another and make each other laugh. Oh, there are moments when they rage out, but there is a respect between the two and perhaps the understanding (and running joke maybe) of how NUTS their parents are!! :)

Naomi, a wonderful post. One day, I want to meet you and swap stories and share our thoughts and I would love to meet your brother Gordon and talk shop with him. What is his presentation on?

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 12:15:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

Hi Naomi! I just loved reading this post about your dear brother Gordon. Of course you have spoke of him before and I know the special bond you have. His new boat looks and sounds great!! I'd be excited to get out and about in it too!!

I loved seeing all the pictures. I think my favorite is you and Gordon and you have that little hat one!! How adorabole you both are there!!

Hugs!!!!

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 12:53:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

I got teary eyes reading this beautiful post...you made me think about my own brother and the love he has for the sea as well...he has a boat too the name is "Gianburrasca"...
The pictures are such a gift...I looked at everyone of them...the eyes, the smiles...so beautiful...

You have a gift...the way you tell stories and life is so passionate...i can read you for hours :)

I also have some news...we are back with a new project and i hope it'll happen...you will see me way more often:)

lots of love,
Maria

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 1:26:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

Congrats on being away so long. I moved nine hours away from my home town. I love visiting but I wouldnt live back there if you paid me too. My home town is only about 6,000 people. Green Bay Wi is about 103,000 people.. What a difference huh?? LOL..

I loved hearing about your brother Gordon. I have two half brothers a half sister. I dont know them that well because of my mother. But those are in back posts now. But thanks for sharing Gordon with us. He is lucky to have a great sister like you.

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 2:43:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

What a nice post about your brother. My brothers died in infancy - so, I never had any big brother to protect me. Instead I became the big sister who protected her little sister...

Love his new boat...

It's been that long since you moved to California...it must be a special place for you to be so happy there.

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 3:07:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

This is just a beautiful and touching post. I love the pictures and it's definitely full of history. I wished I had siblings. Well, I do have half sisters and brothers but we dont have that bond like you have with your siblings.

Anyway, Happy Anniversary to you!!!

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 3:16:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

My daughter and youngest son have that wonderful, close relationship and I feel so blessed to have them.

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 3:30:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

A wonderful trubiute to your beloved brother Gordon, Naomi.
I am glad you have each-other, and have been so close for all these years...
You two look so innocent and yes, charming, in the pictures !
He clearly has found his source of contenmtent in being on the water on his boat, and has also had 2 good marriages and an interesting career. Good for him !

And 48 years in L.A. - I am glad you have found such happiness here :)

Sunday, February 1, 2009 at 7:48:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

I loved this post. Gordon seems like someone I'd love to meet and go boating with. I'm glad you had such loving relationships with Gordon and Gene. Not everyone is so lucky with their siblings. And as always, I really loved the pics. I hope whatever Gordon's physical ailments are, he will be able to have a nice trip to Slovenia and have lots of great adventures on West Wight Potter 19.

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 1:20:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

As always your life (and your brothers) in pictures is amazing and wonderful, wonderful, wonderful.
I always enjoy seeing them

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 3:56:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

How wonderful to read about the closeness and bond that your brother and yourself have.

What fun to have a little runabout boat. I wish I knew someone with a boat - wouldn't want to own one myself but I do enjoy the ocean. And how great to travel around NY in a little runabout! What memories you have...

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 3:56:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

What a lovely tribute to your brother. The pictures really do show a lifetime of love. I have a younger brother and know how important those relationships are. I told my kids, growing up, that of the family, their relationships to each other were most important. They shared genetics and an upbringing. Fortunately they have also stayed very close to each other and that gives me great pleasure.

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 7:37:00 AM PST 

Blogger PI
had this to say:

It's so good that you still have your older brother around and that you can ask him questions like that.
I would give a lot just to talk to my younger brother about the happy times we shared as children, but alas he died, and for years before he died he was in another world.
I hope your brother can sail his boat and enjoy life for many years more.

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 7:47:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

Congratulations on the Anniversary of you moving to LA. You have written about this before so I know what a saving grace this move was for you. I am glad that you found somewhere to belong :)

Your brother sounds wonderful. The relationship you had as kids sounds very much like mine and my brothers. I was the elder by 2 years and we would play together all the time and I would protect him. Unfortunately, this never lasted and he became distant as a teenager. I am very glad that you and Gordon managed to keep that closeness. He sounds like the best of brothers.

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 8:36:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

Gordon's answer as to why he looked over you is just too sweet. Precious, indeed!

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 9:43:00 AM PST 

Anonymous Anonymous
had this to say:

Hi Naomi, very nice post,as I read the way that you express your self and feelings, it has a way of making one feel your own emotions. Unconditional Love, that in itself is precious. Regardless if its from a sibling, or parent or another person, who either has the vision or wisdom, to watch out for others in our lives.And protect us, either from our selves or others. A very hansome man as well.
Congratulations, on yyour years in Califorinia. Pat from NY

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 9:44:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

Happy "anniversary" Naomi and a Happy Birthday to your precious brother. That was a very heartrending post you did dear!

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 12:03:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

What a nice tribute to your dear brother. He looks like a very compassionate and kind man. I hope he reads your blog, and realises just what a loving brother he has been to you, and how much you love and appreciate him.
Thanks for writing this. I have enjoyed reading all about your relationship with Gordon. I have neither brothers or sisters so I find it fascinating to read about a relationship that I have never had.

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 2:49:00 PM PST 

Anonymous Anonymous
had this to say:

happy l. a. anniversary! I beat you here by a few years, but this town was lucky to get ya!

Everybody has a Dina- I seldom become embarrased by the actions of others, but I felt just like you did when I took one of my Studio Club "sisters" to MGM for lunch.My boss had worked at metro, and, as a surprise, arranged for two people I greatly admired to join our table. My "Dina" flatly told Adrienne Fazan (oscar winning editor) you're a nobody, and said she'd never heard of Braunislau Kaper. It got worse and worse. They were very good natured about it (lol) and Braunie sent me flowers for being "such a saint".

A Belated Birthday to the Bro

the fat lady

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 5:42:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

I love this post so much Noami maybe because I have one elder & one younger brother myself.

What a life indeed and I cannot imagine at 80 he is still so active :D

Wishing Gordon well and I've enjoyed your bonding with so much :D

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 5:55:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

Well, a happy day to you, Naomi.
what a lovely tribute to Gordon. thanks for sharing it.

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 8:56:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

I must tell you, I very much enjoyed this post. It is a lovely tribute to your dear brother Gordon. I'm sure he will enjoy reading it too! Cute photo of you at the pool.

Monday, February 2, 2009 at 9:36:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

sorry hon i anit been around my grandma passed away a couple weeks ago and i just trying to pick myself back up. what a great post i am very close with my kid brother even though i just seen him your post made me think of him. i cant wait until summer so he can come down and stay with me.

kisses

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 6:47:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

your older photos are a delight to see!!

How wonderful to never regret moving West!! I'm glad for you.

and wow!! you're so beautiful - as is your brother :)

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 7:04:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

What a wonderful post about your brother (and what a great brother you have too)!

A friend & I were discussing my brother when I was younger and her memories were of him being nasty to me... however, he was rarely like that. I remember him carrying me home after I fell off my bike!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 8:41:00 AM PST 

Anonymous Anonymous
had this to say:

As an only child, I always wanted a brother and reading this extraordinary post about Gordon makes me know ALL the more WHY I wanted one.
I always love seeing those childhood photos of the two of you.
What a truly special human being he is and it's not surprising that you're related. I also teared up when he answered your question by saying, "because you're precious." The love you both share is so obvious. I've enjoyed your other posts here about Gordon. And he's SO right....that may have been why he protected you and loved you as a child....but you haven't changed at all. You're still warm, caring, loving and compassionate. Very much like he is, I'm sure.
And you both have that same zest for life.
I enjoyed this post so much.
Terri
http://www.islandwriter.net

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 10:22:00 AM PST 

had this to say:

Naomi, what a lovely post!
I agree with Lydia, it's great to have a brother to love and be loved by him! You have many beautiful photos of your childhood, that is amazing! Gordon and his wife looks adorable person indeed!

Congratulations on your 48 years in LA! Really a milestone!

Many hugs to you and to Sweetie too!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 1:28:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

48 years of being a Californian. I'm glad you've LOVED being in CA. You've enjoyed that glorious view for many of those years.

Gordon is such a dear man. He knew you were precious and needed some of his protecting from an early age. He looked out for you.
His new boat is wonderful!! I'm happy he got to upgrade to such a nice boat!!!
I recognize that painting behind Gordon and his wife. I can see a bit of your beautiful white rock fireplace behind them too.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE that one photo of you and Gordon where you look so innocent. It is a kind of up close shot, and it is simply adorable.
I also LOVE LOVE LOVE the photo of you with those dark sunglasses. You look amazing!
Gordon is a ladies' man because of his gentle, loving heart. No wonder women have always been drawn to him. I'm sure he treated his wives and children well over the years. He is a gem.
Sorry to hear of his physical woes, but I am thrilled to know he embraces life and is doing the best he can. 80 years old and a truly loving brother.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 4:25:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

Hi Naomi! Congratulations on your move from NY to Los Angeles 48 years ago!

Wonderful post extolling unconditional love between siblings -- and great photos to remember...I'm sure your brother must be very proud of you in sharing this - a rare tribute indeed!

I haven't been posting but I always found reading your blog uplifting. Thank you Naomi for sharing.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 5:39:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

What a nice tribute to Gordon! I feel like I know him now.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 6:26:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

Naomi, you are very lucky to have Gordon...You sound like two peas in a pod....Gordon sounds like quite the seaman, he is such a handsome man.

Congradulations on you move to LA...PS: My favorite picture of the two of you is the one with you in the sun dress with the little white sun hat on...so cute!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 7:52:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

Thank you for sharing your brother with us. That was a very sweet and touching post. It's a good thing that you have such a wonderful relationship with your brother. Many people do not have that.

I, for one, am glad you moved to L.A. Otherwise, I wouldn't have ever met you. For you see, I've not yet been to NY. :)

Tuesday, February 3, 2009 at 9:15:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

I am also blessed with two brothers and two sisters I love dearly. We see each other often and love our families as well.

The post gave me chills as I read it knowing exactly how you feel.

Thanks for sharing..your beautiful thoughts

Dorothy from grammology
grammolgy.com

Wednesday, February 4, 2009 at 4:28:00 PM PST 

had this to say:

Great post and great memories. I really like "Little Boat." It's got such pretty lines. And the 19 footer is a nice sailboat. I have a friend who has one and we've sailed on lakes here in Missouri. Quite a relaxing time without the worry about running out of gas.

Cheers.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009 at 8:08:00 AM PST 

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